About me
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Growth isn’t about how many hardships you’ve had or how tragic they were. Growth is about what story you tell yourself about these hardships. It’s about the perspective you intentionally take when reflecting on what you had to face.
Marija Tafra
University of Michigan
2001 - 2006
years working with youth
Master of Education
Bachelor of English & Psychology
My foundation
Hi! I’m Marija, an internationally certified youth resilience coach with a background in psychology and pedagogy. I’m also a long-time expat and mama intentional about raising three resilient, authentic and confident daughters.
Growing up with and losing a severely physically and mentally impaired sister shaped me in more ways than I can count. I attribute my core values, my big intact family, my take on religion and my choice of profession all to my beloved sister Barbara. Living alongside an individual with countless limitations empowered me to thrive in my life full of countless opportunities. Most importantly, witnessing the pain that she endured instilled in me a resilience that carried me through my own excruciating hardships.
Over the last 20 years, I’ve worked with hundreds of youth in various capacities— teacher, mentor, athletics coach, mediator, supervisor and life coach. The common thread for success in supporting youth in each of these roles was their trust in me.
The personal and professional experiences I bring to coaching — spanning two distinct cultures— give way to deep empathy and genuine respect for every client’s unique differences.
Based in Zagreb and serving teens, emerging adults, and women pregnant after loss across the globe, I meet clients where they are, allowing meaningful mental and emotional shifts to emerge at their own pace.
My journey as a late teen
Despite exceptional insight and inner strength as a child, puberty came at me hard with bullying at its onset.
My grit and gratefulness were buried by tears and agony as I spent the middle school years pulling out of my hair tiny rubber bands that my oppressors flung from behind me in class using pencils as sling shots. My very frizzy, untamed helmet hair was an easy target and they celebrated their wrongdoing by walking past me in the hallways singing “ch-ch-ch-chia!”, the song for the commercial for the chia pet, a special plant pot shaped like a hedgehog with chia seeds growing in all directions from its base. (Evidently, having a sister whose syndrome made her look very different was not enough to set me apart.)
Then, running saved me!
In the 8th grade, I joined track & field and discovered my talent: I was a fast runner—making it to the Michigan State Finals by senior year. Empowered by speed, I gained confidence, found my voice and regained my posture.
From the scrawny, withdrawn and lost teen I was at 13, I transformed into a down-to-earth first-generation late teen confident enough in herself to resist fit influencer beauty norms.
My journey as an emerging adult
To say that my twenties were a whirlwind is an understatement—as it is for many during those years.
During my 2nd year of college at the University of Michigan (Ann Arbor), I had to persevere through final exams just days after my sister passed away (the alternative was to retake the courses).
Later, as the end of my undergraduate studies neared, I struggled to find the answer to the question: “What next?” Eventually, I caved into my parents advice and chose to become a teacher which led me to attaining a Master of Education with a teaching certificate. Would I have chosen differently back then if I had had a life coach? Most likely YES!
I spent a year going mad living again with my parents and going on incessant interviews amidst the start of The Great Recession which had a huge impact on Detroit and made it simply impossible to land a job out of college in Michigan.
In 2007, I hit the road and headed all the way to the south for a high school English teacher job in Atlanta teaching kids of all races. That amalgam of cultures was exceptionally rewarding after growing up in a very mainstream homogeneous environment. In a city where I initially knew nobody, my positions as teacher, track & field coach and Model United Nations advisor quickly introduced me to half the school. I must not forget to mention my unofficial role as counselor to my at-risk students, with them opening up to me about matters that made school life hard for them, like their gang affiliation and parents’ illegal immigrant status.
Despite such an enriching experience in Atlanta, I made my lifelong dream of living in Croatia reality. After over a year of administrative preparation, I packed up my bags (and shipping container) and headed overseas.
My journey as an expat
I’ll be frank. Croatian bureaucracy and an invitation for petty corruption greeted me right at the front door: Customs!
When coming to take over my 20-foot container with my life (and car) in it, a custom’s officer claimed that this wasn’t possible because of a typo on a document issued by the consulate office in Washington D.C. Instead of pulling out US dollars to slip into the officer’s pocket, I dug out my assertive voice and sorted the matter out with his supervisor. It worked. Transport of my container to my home address was scheduled that same day.
I arrived with Croatian citizenship, a nostrified diploma, fluent Croatian language skills at a time when native English speaking skills were hard to come by and expats from the diaspora were one-in-a-million. I had a Masters Degree from a renowned American university, confidence, experience, and drive.
Unfortunately, I was naive. I falsely believed that these assets would ensure I land a full-time job with benefits within a few months.
Instead, months turned to years of working multiple part-time jobs without benefits, living again with my parents in an apartment ¼ the size of our former home and feeling really stuck. While watching my friends on both continents advance in their careers, not to mention the settling down and starting families, I was cemented at square one. My self-esteem and sense of identity took a plunge and after so much effort and more irresponsiveness (from companies) than rejection, it was hard to stay optimistic.
That being said, I never gave up hope. I networked harder, accepted opportunities (I wouldn’t have previously) purely as stepping stones, and I learned over the years how to navigate the Croatian business culture without losing sight of my values and without succumbing to corruption.
It was a tough journey and when I finally made it to secure employment on good terms, I realized it was time to be my own boss doing something I am most passionate about—coaching.
My journey as a woman pregnant after loss
My journey to becoming a mother evolved in ways I never could have imagined–recurrent pregnancy loss, a 5.5 earthquake in the hospital after delivery, and other crises that were out of my control.
My husband and I endured two profound losses during my second trimester. With these losses occurring a year apart, the thought of getting pregnant again seemed insurmountable.
The physical and mental trauma we both experienced during that time laid an extremely shaky foundation for my third pregnancy which ensued just two months after loss. My hormones still hadn’t settled and I was:
- in constant fear of something going wrong,
- detaching from the pregnancy as a way of protecting myself emotionally,
- isolating from friends,
- panicking ahead of each check-up I attended alone,
- feeling lack of support from my spouse because of his different way of coping
I felt so alone.
Getting past my loss anniversary and hearing reassuring news from a major scan at the half-way point gave me a small dose of relief. But it was still hard.
Despite giving birth to a healthy double rainbow baby (without my spouse due to Covid restrictions), our roots were shaken once again as the Zagreb earthquake jolted us out of the hospital just hours after leaving the delivery room. I’ll never forget anticipating the huge aftershock, crouching under the doorframe of my hospital room while holding Roza firmly and desperately trying to soothe her with a voice shakier than the 5.5 earthquake itself.
We arrived home during the first week of the official Covid lockdown, earthquake aftermath and repeated aftershocks. Postpartum pain and complications took a backseat as hypervigilance and ensuring my rainbow baby was within arms reach at all times became a priority.
Eighteen months later hope welcomed another pregnancy, yet trauma unfolded again as my mother was scheduled to undergo a craniotomy to remove a huge tumor literally 7 days after my due date. Anxiety about this major high-risk surgery added to my always present underlying fears of yet another pregnancy going wrong. Luckily, Iris came into this world strong and healthy while my mom was less fortunate having to face ongoing complications and a repeated craniotomy.
My fifth consecutive high-risk pregnancy and needing to go on bed rest for 4 months came as no surprise to anyone who knew me. An urgent need for self-care pushed aside everything else, including work and my two little toddlers who needed and deserved my attention. But my body kept score and demanded I hit the breaks going from 150 to 30 km/hr in order to successfully carry out this pregnancy. Mirta, my ‘Advent child’ came just in time for a peaceful Christmas, the first in several years.
Who I am today
After five years of five pregnancies (2018-2023) and the last few years of breastfeeding and severe sleep deprivation, I now prioritize my basic needs before taking on the role of supermom or superwife.
Getting my own coaching propelled this change—from perfectionism to healthy striving, people pleasing to assertiveness and self-criticism to self-compassion.
I’m a believer that no marriage is perfect and that mine is worth doing the hard work for.
I never dreamed about how many kids I would have and now that I have three I wish I had had before perimenopause, spinal surgery and going so grey!
I got my first tattoo(s) at 42!
I prefer bluntness and honesty to politeness and dishonesty.
I’m Catholic but practice my beliefs in different ways.
While I’m unconventional in a lot of ways, I treasure rituals like reading to my kids before bed and taking them to McDonalds after hospital tests or the dentist.
I’m miserable when I don’t exercise, or at least take a long walk while streaming deep house.
My newest music artist discovery is Raye, who I adore because of her authenticity and healthy self-worth, not to mention her talent!
I have high standards: I know how I want my coffee prepared and where I want to drink it—without my kids, alone or with friends, for hoooours. I also enjoy beer but stick to Pale ale.
I’m a quick-tempered Aries…
So, yes, I admit I’ve occasionally yelled at my kids—I’m human. But I also know they never deserved it and immediately afterwards I explain my wrongdoing and give them a long, loving squeeze.
I’m a bit of a drama queen too (again, Aries)—but not in the attention-seeking kind of way.
I’m a social butterfly who likes hosting and making new connections. I also like the anonymity of airports and big cities.
I don’t miss America but I do treasure childhood memories that only America could have given me.
I was a pet-owner (to a dog, a cat and birds)—now just to a lots of honey bees.
For years, I’ve had a secret dream of acting.
No, I don’t speak English with my kids 🫣.
Balance
Compassion
Hope
Wisdom
Showing up honestly and fully in every situation, without the need to prove or perform.
Authenticity
Meeting others with empathy & recognizing their struggles without judgment.
Envisioning a brighter future and believing in change, even in the face of uncertainty.
Using experience and insight to make thoughtful, meaningful choices.
Balancing time, energy, and focus across all areas of life, in line with personal values.
My path to coaching didn’t begin with a clear plan — it began with a lens.
Studying psychology gave me a new way of understanding people: not just their choices, but the emotions and beliefs shaping them.
After graduating, I became a teacher — what felt like the sensible next step. But in the classroom, I discovered something deeper than teaching content. I connected with youth on a personal level, helping them gain clarity — to see themselves more truthfully, build resilience, and make intentional choices about their future. I saw how much they needed a space where they felt safe, heard, and free from judgment or advice-giving — and I gave them that. They gained coursge, clarity and agency.
While working later in administration, I realized how much I thrived on direct human connection. Encouraged by friends in the US, I explored life coaching and enrolled in an internationally accredited youth resilience coaching program at the Youth Coaching Institute (USA). I began the training only vaguely aware of what coaching truly involved.
What I discovered won me over.
I learned that coaching does not offer advice or ready-made solutions. Instead, through deep listening and powerful questions, it empowers clients to reach their own insights. I valued the structured framework that creates focus and accountability, and I embraced the mindset of breaking challenges into manageable steps. It strengthened not only how I supported others — but how I supported myself.
While balancing work and a family of five, coaching introduced me to self-compassion in action. For the first time in my life, I began practicing self-care to the fullest, most needed extent. Most recently, coaching helped me build resilience through major cervical spine surgery. Debilitating fear shifted into grounded steadiness — through acceptance, cognitive defusion, and values-based focus.
I moved through surgery and recovery not without fear, but with trust.
Coaching did not remove difficulty; it changed my relationship to it. That is what I offer now through Salixa Coaching: learning to choose the perspective that shapes how the light falls on your page….
…because when we shift the lens, we shift our life.
A Polish legend has it that long ago, a mother cat wept by a river as her kittens struggled in the water. The nearby pussy willows swept their branches in to rescue them and the kittens clung tightly to the soft fur-like buds of the willow and were safely brought to shore.
The willow catkin (Salix caprea) symbolizes resilience, new beginnings, and gentle strength—blooming early in spring, its soft catkins endure harsh conditions.
In coaching, it mirrors the gentle growth and untapped potential of today’s youth in times of intense pressure and uncertainty. The story reminds us of the willows empathy and the power of care in the face of hardship.
The Story Behind Salixa
A Polish legend has it that long ago, a mother cat wept by a river as her kittens struggled in the water. The nearby pussy willows swept their branches in to rescue them and the kittens clung tightly to the soft fur-like buds of the willow and were safely brought to shore.
The willow catkin (Salix caprea) symbolizes resilience, new beginnings, and gentle strength—blooming early in spring, its soft catkins endure harsh conditions.
In coaching, it mirrors the gentle growth and untapped potential of today’s youth in times of intense pressure and uncertainty. The story reminds us of the willows empathy and the power of care in the face of hardship.
''Adversity introduces a man to himself."
Albert Einstein
Resilience coaching for teens and emerging adults navigating life transitions.
info@salixa.hr
Copyright © 2026 Salixa obrt za savjetovanje i usluge
My Resilience Timeline
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